Here's The Bit That No One Tells You About Sex After A Baby

This post is sponsored by Lovehoney. All opinions, and all the encouragement, are very much our own.

Nobody at your NCT class will bring this up. Your health visitor definitely won't. But if you've been wondering how to find your way back to each other, we've got you.

Since the baby arrived, your evenings look a little different. There's the feed, the settle, the please just stay asleep negotiations, the collapsing onto the sofa in a state that can only be described as beautifully destroyed. And somewhere between the muslin cloths and the monitor glow, you and your partner have quietly drifted from lovers to logistics managers.

Sound familiar? You're not alone, and more importantly, you're not broken.

That's where we come in. We've teamed up with Lovehoney, the UK's leading sexual wellbeing brand, to talk about getting that spark back. Not in a pressure-filled, tick-box kind of way. But in a slow, deliberate, you've earned this kind of way.

First, give yourself full permission

Before we get into the good stuff, let's acknowledge something: there is no right time to rediscover intimacy post-baby. The NHS recommends waiting until after your six-week check, but beyond that, the timeline is entirely yours. Some couples feel ready at eight weeks. Others at eight months. Both are completely valid.

What matters is that when you do feel ready, you make a little effort. Not because you have to, but because you and your partner deserve to feel close again.

Start with how you feel in your own skin

Before you think about anyone else, think about you. Your body has done something extraordinary. It's changed, it's tired, and if you're anything like most new mums, you probably haven't felt particularly glamorous lately. That's why the first step to reconnecting with your partner is reconnecting with yourself.

Sometimes that starts with something as simple as slipping into something that makes you feel like you again. Not a nursing bra. Not a set of maternity leggings. Something that's entirely for you.

Lovehoney Bombshell Black Lace Babydoll Set

Plunging lace cups, a sheer booty-skimming skirt and a matching thong. Designed to make you feel like yourself again, in the best possible way. Available in regular and plus sizes.

RRP £29.99 | With your Cubbi 20% discount: £24

Set the scene like you mean it

Here's a radical idea. Treat a Tuesday night like a date. You don't need a babysitter, a restaurant booking, or a reason. You just need the baby to be asleep and fifteen minutes of effort.Dim the lights, put something on that isn't Bluey, and bring in a product that transforms the whole atmosphere of a room. A proper, grown-up massage oil changes everything. It slows you both down, gets you out of your heads, and gets you into each other.

Lovehoney Apothecary A Scent to Arouse Massage Oil

Bursting with fresh lemon rind, deepening into sultry rose and jasmine, with a warm base of vanilla, precious woods and amber. Smooth it into your partner's skin and let the evening take its own direction.

RRP £9.99 | With your Cubbi 20% discount: £8

Switch it up and try something a little new

This is the perfect moment to shake things up rather than trying to pick up where you left off. Introducing something new removes any pressure to perform or recreate some pre-baby version of your sex life, and instead makes intimacy feel like a fresh start for you both. Think of it as a relaunch, not a comeback.

We-Vibe Sync 2, available through Lovehoney, is designed for exactly this kind of moment. It's worn during sex, delivering vibrations to both partners at the same time, hands-free. The adjustable, flexible fit means it works for a range of body types and positions, which matters when your post-baby body might feel unfamiliar. It's whisper-quiet (monitor safe, we checked), and controlled via remote or the free app. It's the kind of thing that makes the whole experience feel new again, for both of you.

We-Vibe Sync 2 Couples Vibrator

Vibrations for both partners, simultaneously. Adjustable fit, 10 intensity settings, fully waterproof and rechargeable. App and remote controlled. Whisper-quiet.

RRP £149.99 | With your Cubbi 20% discount: £120

Things Might Feel A Little Different 'Down There'

Here is something nobody warns you about, and honestly, they should. After having a baby, things can feel different during sex. Not wrong, not broken, just different. Hormonal changes, particularly if you are breastfeeding, can cause vaginal dryness, which makes intimacy uncomfortable or even painful. It is incredibly common and it is nothing to be embarrassed about.

The simplest fix? A really good lubricant. Not an afterthought, not something you dig out of a drawer from three years ago. A proper, quality lube that makes everything feel easy again.

Liquid Silk Lube

Lovehoney's Liquid Silk is one of the best-loved lubes on the market for good reason. It is water-based, non-tacky, long-lasting and feels genuinely silky rather than sticky or clinical. It comes in a generous 250ml pump bottle so it is easy to use in the moment, and a little goes a very long way. Condom-safe and suitable for use with toys too, this is the one to keep on your bedside table.

RRP £12.99 | With your Cubbi 20% discount: £11

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You've read this far, which means part of you is already thinking yes, it's time. So here's your gentle nudge: pick one thing. The babydoll. The massage oil. A conversation about what you both want right now. Just one small step back towards each other.

Cubbi members get 20% off at Lovehoney. Head to the app to grab your discount code and shop the full couples range at lovehoney.co.uk. Beautifully packaged, discreetly delivered, and made by people who genuinely understand that great intimacy is about far more than the physical.

This post contains affiliate links. Cubbi may earn a small commission on purchases made through these links, at no extra cost to you. Products are recommended in genuine partnership with Lovehoney. Prices correct at time of publication. All products are intended for adults aged 18 and over.